TSG Plays Santa Claus

Happy Holidays from The Shin Guardian.

To the brothers TSG, Christmas is all about giving, not receiving. Matthew and I are notorious among our family for spending too much time trying to find the right gift for people. However, we have a fairly high conversion rate on those gifts.

So, in the spirit of the season and the TSG way, we are eschewing the conventional “soccer gifts I want for Christmas” piece. In its stead TSG is playing Santa and handing out* gifts to some of our favorite USMNTers.

If any of our readers received any soccer-related gifts this year tell us about them in the comment section.

For Stu Holden…A Magic Eight Ball
It seems like Iceman is in need of some decision-making help. What could be better than the most popular tool in the solar system when one has trouble making a decision? (Will Stu Holden stay with Dynamo?…”Outlook not so good.”)

For Landon Donovan…Billabong Marius Snowboard Jacket
Congratulations on the Everton loan. Perhaps it is the right move from a soccer perspective, but trading in the paradise that is Manhattan Beach, CA for the much cooler temps of Liverpool during the winter months was a bit short-sighted. TSG specifically chose the Marius for its bright colors as we recommend taking every precaution to ensure you come out of the Everton Experiment in fine working order.

For Benny Feilhaber…Eagle Creek Comfort Plus Neck Pillow
“Comfort Plus” that’s what the official unofficial favorite player of TSG provides for the USMNT when he is on the pitch. More importantly, TSG wants Benny! to travel in style and comfort in 2010 so he is primed and ready to go following long trips to Camp Cupcake and South Africa.

For Tim Howard…Bubble Wrap and a Defender
Timmy keeps getting hammered in Everton and could use a little extra protection in front of him and (literally) on his body.

For Coach Bob Bradley…A World Atlas
After seeing Bradley’s predilection for MLS players throughout 2009, TSG wants to make sure that Bob-O is aware that there are other countries outside of the United States where Americans play soccer.

* “Handing out” is used metaphorically as we couldn’t find a box big enough to fit Dolf Lundgren (See “Defender” link.)

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One response to this post.

  1. Posted by Antonio H. on 2009/12/28 at 12:49 AM

    I know i’m a couple days too late, but let’s get Jozy bigger legs, 10 more pounds of muscle, and a soft 1st touch

    Reply

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