Archive for the ‘Beer & Soccer Review Series’ Category

Late Night Ponderings: We Need Answers

Late night at TSG headquarters.

Due to TSG’s full-time employment that takes a good chunk of our waking hours, writing tends to take place late at night. This often leads Matthew and I to engage in Gmail chat that starts with a point, but then meanders its way through the soccer world.

Recently, we’ve been ending up with more questions then answers and we’re hoping our readers could help us out.

Any chance the NFL and MLB conspired to send Glazer and Hicks over to the EPL to eliminate future competition? American-run Manchester United and Liverpool are mired in debt…do Americans hate soccer that much that they will go to such great lengths to destroy it? (please note sarcasm.)

Any chance the boys on the other side of the pond will agree to start Premiership matches later in the day for us sunshine-soaked folks on the left coast? Jozy and the Tigers taking on City at 7:00am?…okay. But the Howard-Donovan Bowl at 4:45am?!?…c’mon.

Any chance we’ll see Jozy Altidore blast one in the back of the net versus City? The Altidore Goal Watch will stand at 154 days when he takes the pitch on Saturday. (I’ve got a feeling…I think.)

Any chance US Soccer will to stop pimping the USMNT’s 14th spot in the world rankings? The US has beaten exactly two non-CONCACAF team in the past year.

Any chance the World Cup will not sell-out? Ticket sales are said to be struggling amid cost and security concerns. FIFA will probably get there, but chances of going back-to-back England ’18 and USA ’22 are probably a little better as a result of the “learning experience.”

Any chance the soccer community (and FIFA) will be as outraged over the CAF decision to ban Togo for two Africa Cup of Nations tournaments as it was over the Henry handball? How can the “rebels-shooting-up-the-team-bus” principle not trump the “government-interference” principle? Disgusting.

Any chance the soccer media will abandon their best TMZ impersonation and return to their regularly-scheduled programming of actually covering the game? Sure, Terrygate may have an impact on the World Cup, but Wynalda and Harkes aren’t in the player pool according to US Soccer.

Any chance we’ll see Bob Bradley fill the two coaching vacancies on the USMNT sideline? FYI, Bob-O…it’s a World Cup year…might be a good idea to have the help.

Any chance each MLS franchise will team-up with a local micro / craft brewer to spread the word about the link between the beautiful game and the beautiful beverage? This beer-and-soccer thing is starting to catch on.

Thanks, Drew!

Any chance, speaking of promotional opportunities, that soccer can get more high-profile celebrity fans in the US? Drew Carey has done a great job, but he can’t do it all. Shouldn’t Galaxy be choppering-in Megan Fox or Matt Damon for the home opener?

Any chance the USMNT will mandate that injured players must rehab with Charlie Davies to get a understanding of the power of human will and determination?

Beer & Soccer Series: What’s Your Yankee Brew?

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Kyle Beckerman Pale Ale

(Can someone Facebook this sucker….we need more input!)

If you remember, the genesis of our beer series was a little spat my brother and I had in the comments section about who was the expert of what? From those handbags, came the dawn of the great “Beer & Soccer Review” Series on TSG as well as the second installment today.

For those that missed our first installment, it’s going to be tough to beat. Kyle Beckerman’s very-own Pale Ale….we’ll try our best. (By the way, when we gave the beer to Kyle he walked away and said to Geoff Cameron, “Dude! I have my own beer!”)

We’ve composed a panel of experts–minus the TSG crew on hand–to help us select the appropriate brew for the appropriate USMNT event.

Need a bevy recommendation for the next USMNT friendly? Just scroll down here.

Not sure what to stock for the June 12th affair with the Queen? Look no further.

First, our panel of experts:

The Free Beer Movement in action....

He’s a man with too many USMNT jerseys. He’s got a blog and a dream…and it has to do with beer. Say hello to Dan from the Free Beer Movement. He’s going to be like the Simon Cowell of this thing; I can feel it. I mean c’mon the guy grew up in Milwaukee and now lives in Texas. Beer, beer, beer!

He owns the only establishment in the greater San Francisco area that carried the English telecast of the States-Honduras qualifier in October….and he’s not even American. Don’t judge him…let him judge something greater than us all. Welcome Steve Pritchard, owner of Danny Coyles in San Francisco’s Lower Haight district.

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The True MLS MVP (Most Valuable Pale)

Note from TSG: Late last week, Mark and I got into a little tiff on beers…and thus our Beer & Soccer Review Series was born.

TSG is kicking off the series with a kick*ss piece from Die Hipster Brewing Co.

Die Hipster is a San Francisco miniature-brew founded by my Black Sox soccer teammate Chris Hanson and Scott Riley. I’ve had their beer and all I can say is, “Tasty!” and “Arrange transportation beforehand.”

Who is the real MLS MVP?

So without further adu, Die Hipster Brewing and their take on MLS MVP.

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In deference to the upcoming MLS Cup,  Die Hipster Brewing is proud to introduce and announce the results of the 1st Annual MLS MVP (Most Valuable Pale).  We at Die Hipster have been brewing for years and have attempted many styles – from  the dull catenaccio of a partial mash ale to the Totaalvoetbal of an imperial bourbon porter.  In the process, we’ve all but completely overlooked pale ales, much like most of the globe has overlooked MLS.  To remedy this, we spent the summer producing three MLS-themed pale ales in the lead-up to an eventual group judging event to determine an MVP.

Our candidates were chosen based on their sheer “MLSness” (not to mention their paleness).

Riles & Hanson: Dropping science

These three beers are named for three of the hardest working MLS semi-stars whose play has earned them a few appearances for the USMNT but scant European interest and only, it seems, from the Scandinavian part of the continent, which will work doubly in their favor when the Minnesota Thunder finally get their MLS franchise.  In the meantime, their current MLS squads are happy to have them.

In creating recipes, we kept within pale ale style guidelines, but went for three different grain mixtures.  We used the same yeast (similar to Sierra Nevada’s) for all three.  The goal was nothing too crazy or involved, just serviceable pale ales that will do the job without wanting to make real money (read: euros) or get identified on the streets of America.

The Eddie Gaven

The first selection, we went with Eddie Gaven. To get ourselves in Eddie’s mindset, we channeled our inner Eddie Gaven and in a specific nod to Gaven’s highly respected and publicized devote and pious nature, we asked ourselves not “WWJD?”, but, with the holidays approaching, “What Would Jesus….Brew?!”

As a result, Gaven’s beer was a fairly basic but a little heavier on the hop schedule – Gaven’s game, after all, is nothing if not bitter – along with some dry-hopping to finish it off.  The result was a pretty robust pale that could be mistaken for an IPA in some circles. Not bad for the player who was the youngest to score for the, uh, MetroStars and sports that stubbly beard. Is that perma-stubble-plus?

The Kyle Beckerman

The second selection went to Kyle Beckerman.  Beckerman’s beer had a healthy dose of malt, owning the appropriate moniker ‘Special B’.

Unfortunately, an eighth-inch log of his hair proved difficult to procure in Sandy, UT.  This one was also dry-hopped and the ‘Special B’ livened up the overall flavor profile – almost like marking said shorter dude who hasn’t washed his hair in 15 years.

The Dax McCarty

The last selection was Mr. Dax McCarty.  In our best deadpan, Dax’s beer had to stand out from the pack.  To accomplish this, we replaced specialty grains with malted grains and flaked wheat.  The result was a much lighter and drinkable pale that we hope will make an appearance in the 72nd minute in a Friendly possibly against Slovakia.  And….wait, yes that just happened.  Pretty sure Slovakia’s Martin Skrtel is the only Slovakian player who has ever faced a red head on the field (Scholes) before Dax danced his way on.  Sadly the Dax pale was neither made with nor tasted like Ginger.

The Victor

So who won?  The same player that could also be the MLS Cup MVP:  Kyle Beckerman by the length of one of his dreads (read: in a malodorous landslide).  There were only a small percentage of votes cast for Eddie and Dax.  While we also voted for Beckerman, Dax has grown on us quite a bit and is a session pale we were really looking for.

Since our brewery is not a democracy, next summer, Dax will be made again. Perhaps just in time for his cameo in South Africa?

We’ll need nominations for two new challengers to get called up to participate in the 2nd annual MLS Most Valuable Pale. Please nominate below in the poll or the comments.

For more information on Die Hipster Brewing and the MLS Most Valuable Pale recipes.

From TSG: A sincere thanks to Chris and Scott for the good read. If anyone has any questions, about such things as oh “beer” and/or “procurement,” please email shinguardian@gmail.com and we’ll bundle up the emails, float the pigeon and get you a response.

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