JZA goes MIA: Brown Starting Vets

We’re halftime of the Chelsea-Liverpool standoff and reflecting back on Jozy Altidore’s absence from yesterday’s Hull – Wigan matchup.

A hypothetical call from USMNT coach Bob Bradley to Hull City skipper Phil Brown:

Briiiiiing, Briiiing

Jozy: Pine-riding in Hull City

Jozy: Pine-riding in Hull City

Bob: Hey Phil, it’s Bob.

Phil: Bob, who?

Bob: The U.S. men’s national team head coach

Phil: Oh, that guy that wears sweatpants. How are you? Going to hit up the Ivy Leagues again after 2010?

Bob: Well, I was thinking maybe the Philadelphia Union; they’re a new team and bound to make some mistakes–I mean have some growing pains.

Phil: Oh good for you. Is there a reason you called Bob. Did you want some strategy?

Bob: Strategy, oh no, I’m set on that I just wish I could play a few more defenders out there instead of strikers. You know?

Phil: I don’t, but was there a question here? We beat Wigan yesterday, but the fans still want to crucify me and I have to prepare for next week.

Bob: Wow, that’s impressive. About our boy, I need him to get some playing time over there.

Phil: Well, Bob, Jozy’s got a few challenges with getting back into the line-up. First of all, he’s green and he doesn’t manage possession well up the field. I would be fine with him learning on the job….if it didn’t mean my job.

Bob: I understand Phil. I can’t afford the reps either sometimes that’s why I bring in my big Hawaiian guy though I’m likely not to get a goal out of it. What else is it?

Geovanni: A key cog for the Tigers

Geovanni: A key cog for the Tigers

Phil: Now he’s got a little bit of competition upfront. I mean, for chrissakes, he was competing for time up top against Craig Fagan and Daniel Cousin. Daniel Cousin! I mean he should’ve beat those guys out. Now, I’ve got V of H (nickname for: Jan Vennegoor of Hesselink) up top who brings some veteran presence, I’ve got Geovanni who just signed a new contract playing my point forward role like Ronaldo, and then I’ve got Ghilas off the bench who is more active than Carlos Tevez. Where am I going to put the kid in there?

Bob: I see your points. I’ll make a deal with you. You still need offense right? I’ll talk to Lando about taking a stab in the EPL and mention Hull City a few times. You throw in Altidore as a sub in the 2nd half and keep pushing his fitness and his possession maintenance.

Phil: Agreed, but one more thing Bob.

Bob: Phil?

Phil: Get yourself a nice button down combo or something.

Bob: Click

9 responses to this post.

  1. Posted by Ryan on 2009/10/04 at 9:58 AM

    I didn’t realize US Soccer possessed the headset technology needed to communicate with Phil Brown across the Atlantic.


    • Posted by matthewsf on 2009/10/04 at 10:01 AM

      We have like 30 extra headsets from the telethon when we were trying to get any Americans to the Gold Cup final at the Meadowlands.


  2. Posted by Matthew N on 2009/10/04 at 10:06 AM

    I think Jozy just needs some time to adjust to the English game. He is going to have to get used to the physical play and perfect his first touch. I’d love to see him more but I really think he is not ready. Let’s hope he gets ready so he can get some quality experience before the world cup.


    • Posted by matthewsf on 2009/10/04 at 10:07 AM

      Agreed, he needs time adjusting. But he is reliant on Hull moving up from the bottom of the table or Brown’s going to have to play it safe.


  3. Posted by Antonio H. on 2009/10/04 at 11:02 AM

    i thought Ghilas and Jozy would be pairing up for the rest of the season after Jozy’s debut. . .i guess not. But at least Charlie’s playing full 90s.


  4. Posted by Wilson on 2009/10/04 at 11:43 PM

    Jan V of H is … I mean was a best of a striker. If Jozy dosn’t improve from watching him play then Jozy isn’t the real deal. Giving him playing time may improve his first touch but off the ball movement is something that shows in practice.


  5. Posted by matthewsf on 2009/10/05 at 5:13 PM

    One more thing: I think the challenge you have with Jozy getting on the field is not only V of H, but Geovanni playing so far up the pitch. If the team is up, then Geovanni can drop from his upfield position to a more defensive stance.

    Ghilas is a good reliever because he’s a ball hawk.

    JZA will get run, but I think Hull need more breathing room from the bottom of the table before it is anything consistent.


  6. […] Answer: Wrong question, it should have been “Will he earn enough time to improve?“ […]


  7. […] October 4th, 2009: Jozy is screwed into the bench by then-Hull City Manager Phil Brown who’s relying on veterans. TSG mocks a call between USMNT coach Bill Bradley and Brown. […]


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